A Misplaced Line in my Novel

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Wouldn’t it be more beautiful if we met ahead of time? Wouldn’t it be more perfect if we spent time together much earlier than we expected? Wouldn’t it be more exciting back then to know we have our whole lives ahead of us? Wouldn’t it be more satisfying to reach all of our dreams together? Or wouldn’t it be more calming to accept and settle with our fate?

It’s vivid how I tell you at the time we would need to stop at some point, and your eyes keep bawling. If it was you saying, I would have rolled my eyes too and said it would never happen. I used to think that soulmates were not real, but rather something made of wishful thinking and fairy tales. I believed that our life partner would simply be the one that we could make it work with, someone “good enough” for us. And truth be told, I was always against the thought of “searching for Mr. Right”, leaning towards the fact that everyone has flaws and thus no one could be completely “right”.

Voila and I found mine. At a good time but in a very peculiar situation. The moment I got to know you opened a door full of butterflies in the garden I didn’t know I was taking care of. The magnitude of consistency and the way I’m loved is honestly the bare minimum but for me, it was extraordinary. 

I love the way you look at me, the way you make me laugh, the way you tell me to have a massage because my arm is always sore, and for cooking food for me which nobody has done before. These simple gestures you do can sweep me off my feet. How can I not love you when every time I see you my heart melts and I instantly fall for you? I don’t think I would ever get tired of falling in love with you over and over and over again. And yes, I can name more. Heaven knows we’re having the best times of our life when we’re together and I will never regret having a piece of my life shared with you. 

I love you because you deserve to be loved. I love you with your flaws and as you shared your weaknesses, I didn’t love you less. I love you simply for who you are, what you were, and what you will be. I love you just because I love you. I love you more today than I did yesterday and I will love you tomorrow more than I do today. And if you think I have loved you more than enough already… allow me to love you just a little bit more. From afar.

We both tried but it isn’t very lovely to know we’re both hurting each other just to stay afloat. What’s the point of staying up and above if the pain outweighs the happiness that these lines pseudo-comfort us both. It was short but it was worthwhile. In another lifetime, may this misplaced line in our novel find its right place and timing.

To every individual we cross paths with, there is something we could learn IF we let ourselves learn something. Because even if the person seems right for you but the timing isn’t, then they are not what you truly need. They are simply what you desire currently. By embracing this perspective, we can navigate life’s challenges with resilience and gratitude. We can find beauty even amid heartache. Every chapter, whether joyous or painful, contributes to the rich and meaningful story of our lives.

This is US.

Of Shifts and Choices

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Making decisions has an impact on every aspect of your life, including how you interact with your family and handle commonplace circumstances. Everybody in life must make both wise and foolish decisions that could either positively or negatively impact their life. Yes, everyone aspires to lead a moral life. Does that, though, always occur? 90% of the time, they are aware.

This year of my life as I was transitioning and nearing my 30s, I’ve made two huge decisions: shifted my career and accepted a huge leadership responsibility. Why? Because… Why not?

Almost 8 years of working at the Commission on Population and Development is one experience that I would never trade for in a lifetime. This is where a l learned a lot of lessons, and skills and even learned all of these the hard way. Being young and energetic working in the government can sometimes be a curse. For some, I may be having the time of my life traveling and going places but my soul is tired and my mental health is deteriorating. I have maxed out all the opportunities that there is for me with the Commission, and with that, I left with a grateful heart. It was fun while I was there, but my everyday work did not spark joy anymore. Just like any people, my priorities changed too and what I was doing did not anymore align with my life plans.

Just in time as I was switching jobs, I was confronted with the opportunity to lead my organization, JCI Iloilo Ilang Ilang. I have been with the organization doing volunteer work for almost 7 years and during that time, I have been fulfilling my passion-which is to serve others. It was one August afternoon when I finally accepted the challenge and what comes after that is the history I am creating. I do not know what’s ahead of me in this journey but for sure, I’ll do my best in everything because that’s what I always do. I do not want this opportunity to pass as this is only a once-in-a-lifetime avenue to showcase and share what I’ve got. Whatever 2024 has for me and the organization I lead, I hope and pray that the Lord may guide us in all our undertakings.

A person’s life is the result of their decisions. Every person makes decisions several times a day, ranging from minor decisions like what to eat for lunch and what to dress to significant ones like picking a future career. All of my life, I’ve been faced with making decisions. Because each option has pros and cons, there are moments when I’m undecided. In these situations, I attempt to gather my composure and quickly perform a cost-benefit analysis. I can give you a good example of a decision I made in my life that had an impact on my personality.

Every day, and the days ahead, never be afraid of making shifts and choices. Because that’s how we grow.

Next Time

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I hope the next time you fall in love, it is with someone who inspires hope. The one who does miracles. A love that heals gently. A love that does not make you loathe yourself or forget your worth. A love that reminds you that you have always been valuable.

The next time love knocks on your door, I hope it will be the kind that sounds like Sunday afternoon radio music, the effort of writing a love letter, the flavor of your favorite pizza, the giggles of a four-year-old, the delight of dancing in the rain, the wonders of stargazing, the scent of freshly cut grass, the beauty of butterflies chasing each other, or the satisfaction that comes from being content with the natural love you currently have.

I hope the next time you fall in love, you will love deeply. Kiss them in public to demonstrate how proud you are to have found one of the most incredible persons to adore. Kiss them gently. Kiss them passionately.

I hope that the next time you fall in love, you will also appreciate the parts of yourself that you disliked–the overthinking neurons, your fear of rejection and being judged, your fear of not being good enough.

I hope you fall hard with yourself the next time because this time, this person you found- this gorgeous, full of magic, kind-hearted person you fall in love with- is making you love yourself more- your flaws and defects.

I hope the next time you fall in love, you’ll remember that love is worth the risk. And you’ll be glad you gave yourself permission to open your heart again.

When you next fall in love,
It will come true.
It’ll be a deep dive.
It’ll be stunning.

Choose yourself, over and over

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Everything you’ve ever wanted from someone else, give it to yourself.

Everything you’ve ever wanted to hear, say it to yourself.

The love letters. The compliments. The quality time. The dates. The open communication. The “I’m so proud of you’ and the ‘I love you just the way you are’. The sunsets. The validation. The flowers and chocolates. The deep conversations. The patience. The softness. The gentle love.

When you give it all to yourself, you’ll be able to choose healthier relationships. You already know you can meet your own needs, so you won’t go searching for love from a place of lack.

You will no longer romanticize the bare minimum. You’ll only be on the look out for someone that can value you in the same way you value yourself (or maybe not at all, but it’s okay).

It creates a natural filter for who you allow into your world.

On Pause; and It’s Okay

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Life has a funny way of telling us to do what we have to do, achieve our goals on our timeline, and have the break we have. If we don’t know how to balance these things, we can get lost.

We’ve been built to compete. We were born to chase dreams. I’ve never met anyone who wouldn’t give their arm to achieve their objectives and ambitions. On the other hand, running is not the same as breathing; unlike running, we do not need to stop and skip breaths. Take a look at your jogging routines: you’re not running a marathon; you’re usually jogging for 30 minutes to an hour. When you’ve reached your limit, take a break to collect your breath, sip some water, and relax. Then you’re off for a few more rounds of running. 

It becomes monotonous as you go through life as an adult, ticking off goal after goal with no indication of ending. You’ve been a machine for the previous few years, programmed to find a job, come up with decent work, be a provider, act appropriately, go to sleep, and repeat. You get up and repeat the process. It’s become a habit. But why is this happening? Is this a fantasy or a responsibility? While doing and achieving all of these things for your family is fulfilling (no one compelled you to do anything in the first place), the sad truth is that you lose yourself. Others employ you, but what about you? 

You desired immediate fulfillment, but nothing happens overnight. You unknowingly exhaust yourself by becoming overly preoccupied with your dreams and acting on them. As a result, you begin to abuse your mind and body and your abilities and resolve. As a result, your craft becomes less efficient. Much more, you lose sight of what you’re pursuing and why. Nobody likes to veer off track on their way to achieving their goals. As much as you don’t want to acknowledge it, you need a break, and it’ll be one of the best decisions you’ll ever make.

The wonderful thing about taking a vacation from ruthless goal-setting is that it allows you to explore other aspects of your life, even if only for a short. You won’t feel as if you’re drowning or in over your head (at least not all the time). Instead, you’ll make more time to spend with friends, explore your interests and passions, and spend time with family, revitalizing you and putting you in a good mood. When you get back to work, you’ll be able to channel that great energy into your vast goal. 

Take a break if you need to. Breaks can benefit your goals because they allow you to separate from them and return with renewed energy and focus. You owe it to yourself to calm your thoughts, explore your interests, spend time with your family and friends, and, simply put, treat yourself once in a while!

5 Adjustments I Needed to Make After Moving to South Korea

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South Korea is probably known to everyone as the land of the oppas or where the term ‘Hallyu’ originated. Entertainment and rich culture shocked the world how the country is so progressive in terms of technology. I moved here two months ago, and it’s only now that I can gather my thoughts and put them in writing. Indeed, South Korea is something.

This is my second time in South Korea, but this is the first time that I’m staying for more than six months. I am currently on a scholarship funded by the Korean government, and being physically here gave me so many things to adjust to and ponder upon. Consider that this is my first time away from the Philippines for something long.

  1. My Sleeping Routine
  • I am a morning person since only God knows when and is usually up by 5:30 AM. I do my drill (which includes time for myself, reading, and even meditating). I go on with my day and tasks related to my daily goals. At 10:00 PM, I am lying in bed and trying to sleep, so by the time the clock hits 11:00 PM, and I am already in the dreamland. However, it is not the case here. Maybe it’s not only my academic requirements that caused the adjustment, but 5:30 AM is just so early for Koreans, and in a way, I kind of adapted to it. Now, I wake up at 7 AM and go to bed at midnight at the latest. I hope it stays that way for a while.

2. The Food

  • Being a Filipina means going crazy over meat, regardless of kind. In the Philippines, I go insane over Jollibee, McDonald’s, or even street food as long as it is meat. When I was cooking at my place, I still cooked meat, and only when I had the appetite for each vegetable, I take it. But things changed here. Upon my arrival here, I was quarantined for two weeks, and all of my meals have vegetables and fruits. I had no choice. I’m shy to ask for it to be changed. When I had to transfer to Wonju (where my school is), I realized how healthy I felt when I was eating vegetables, so as much as I can, I cook and vegetables here in the dormitory. Kimchi always makes me happy now.

3. The Ppali-Ppali Culture

  • I hate tardiness. I always make sure that I’m always on time of few minutes ahead of schedule. For me, it’s okay that I’ll be the one waiting than other people waiting for me. Being on time means giving yourself ample allowance to prepare for anything. However, here, it’s a different kind of thing. Koreans tend to be constantly mindful of the time here, and I have to keep up (even though I have always been aware of the time). Let’s take, for example, the bus. I always catch myself running for me not to miss it. But it’s okay, and I will get used to it.

4. My Shopping/Grocery List

  • I don’t like spending money, but I always make sure that it’s worth it when I do. That includes shopping and even buying food. I believe things are based on what I need for the week. For example, I’ll buy 1 kilo of pork and 1/2 kilo of chicken for the week along with three pieces of onions and one whole part of garlic). Here, I can’t do that. Everything here is sold in bulk. Tissues, ramen, tomatoes, fruits, and even bread. That’s why I always share it with my classmates so things won’t go bad. Plus, the market here is at least 30 minutes away from my University, so I always need to make time for this one.

5. My environment

  • I have been living in the Philippines by myself for ten years now and living here alone is not new to me. However, my world outside the room is a complete unfamiliarity- in a good way. Back home, I have buildings all over, jeepney sounds, and even waking up next to my dogs (which I miss). Here in Wonju, I wake up to birds chirping, cold weather, and a melancholic vibe. When I go out on a walk, I can find myself in the middle of the forest and in the middle of the bridge where a beautiful lake is situated. But I wouldn’t have it any other way. I appreciate everything in here. It enables me to think more carefully and be fully present.

Living outside my home country is such a wonderful experience and I am very grateful of this journey that was given to me.

A Better Year Ahead

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A lot of us have been affected by how 2020 turned out to be. Absent families, lost jobs, stolen opportunities, and bothered mental health. If not all, most people thought of 2020 as the worst year, and I would also have to admit that. Although 2020 has been cruel, it left us with a bountiful number of lessons to carry on the rest of our lives.

2021 is never promised. Likewise, it is tomorrow. I bet we would never be this hopeful if the pandemic didn’t hit us in the previous year. No matter what we went through in 2020, I hope it will never be an excuse to be hopeful this year. Let’s be optimistic about things that may come our way as the Law of Attraction has been doing something to people lately. To help us go through 2021 and rehabilitating our year, let us:

Be Grateful

We survived 2020 for a reason. Whatever reason that is, it is more than enough to give thanks to the Almighty. There may be things that we weren’t able to accomplish last year- dreams, jobs, finances. This year is the right time to get yourself back up! Remember, we can only improve ourselves when we accept where we are right now, and being grateful for our existence today is the first step.

Invest in yourself

Self-discipline is such an expensive thing that not all people can afford it. It needs courage, persistence, and commitment. Never get tired of learning new things– of reading a lot, of ceasing opportunities, learning a new skill, and whatever task that your future self will thank you for. You can never go with self-love but know the limits between loving yourself and being selfish. Slowly lessen your time on social media and start watching documentaries or any movie you can learn from.

Help others

Helping others does not require you to have a lot of money. It could mean extending a hand to those who need assistance in doing a resume, an application letter, and even just a referral. Little gestures can mean so much to people around you. Help a community through volunteering. The least you can do is to donate. If not, prayers. 

Be kind. Even to yourself

Our economic status is not a passport to treat people rudely. Always have the mindset to give the same rights to a CEO and a janitor. Money, position, and power do not equate necessarily to compassion. This world is already suffering– let’s not add up. In a world where you can be anything, be the bigger person, and be kind. If things go wrong, always remember also to be kind to yourself.

Cut off toxic people in your life

Family is one of the many foundations in our life. Families, aside from friends, can also be one of the most toxic influences. This is a sign to cut them off if they aren’t right for your mental health. Move out from your parents’ house if necessary. Skip family reunions if you don’t feel like it. Change your social sphere. Be alone to build relationships with the ones supporting and rooting for you. Life is too short.

The year 2021 is so unpredictable that it can make our goals list turn into the trash instantly. You see, we don’t have a choice but to go with whatever this year has in store for us and try to adapt on our way just like what we did in 2020. 2021 might not be the best year but let’s benefit from the doubt that it will be better than in 2020. Claim it, and you’ll have it.

Cheers!

Refreshed in Japan

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I capped off my 25th birthday last year by taking a leisure trip in Japan. This was the time for me to relax after month of studying and preparing for my Comprehensive Examination in the University of the Philippines for my Master’s Degree.

It was an almost a week trip and I didn’t tap any travel agency to help me with my itineraries. With ample research, I did everything by myself- from finding where to stay, directions, cheap tickets, and even food. This trip was definitely one for the books and this let me realize that I will never get tired of visiting Japan.

I still have my itinerary with me so if you guys want to have access to it, just send me an e-mail. I visited Osaka, Hiroshima, Nara, Kobe, and Nagoya.

All video clips are mine. Music is credited to the rightful owner. No copyright infringement intended.

Quarter of a Century

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Sitting alone in my hotel room corner while sipping on my lemon water, things started to come to my senses on how blessed I am. Few days before I turn 26 and enter my late 20s journey, there are lessons that I have to learn the hard way that I’d also like to bear in mind until I’m no longer able to do the things like I used to.

I faced the quarter-life crises when I was 23-24 years old, so by the time I turned 25 (which was last year), my life priorities became more explicit. My activities shifted, and I guess a bit of my personality has changed. I used to be an open book since I was in high school, and by that, I mean all of the things that I was up to is posted on social media. Whenever I think of those times, those were so cringy I can bury myself in this blanket in my bed the whole day. In 2016 when I changed my Facebook account, and since last year, I have continuously been deactivating it to transition myself from a SocMed addict to someone who practices mindfulness. I believe I have succeeded, and by this time, I also lessen my screen time on Instagram (which I am again doing a great job). I love how bold I became in abandoning my Facebook and Instagram, updating people about me once or twice every quarter (or maybe never), and to tell you frankly, I want to keep it that way.

I have always been a bookworm reading from a range of Nancy Drew soft bounds to Sidney Sheldon stories when I was in high school. I remember I will wake up at 6:00 in the morning, sit by the window, read a chapter or two, and hurriedly get ready for school, starting at 7:30 AM. Not until College that I had to let go of that habit since I was so bummed up with academics and student council responsibilities. I tried to revive the pattern when I started working, but it just won’t work since I always have to travel from one LGU to another from the very dawn of the morning and sometimes until midnight in the middle of the sea. During the lockdown back in March, it allowed me to rekindle my love for reading. Up until now, I have a target to read two different books in a month because I feel like it feeds my soul. I do it every morning, just after I say my prayers for a beautiful day ahead of me. My life became purposeful, and I became more grateful when I started reading John Maxwell’s books and Steven Covey’s books. I want to collect their pieces, but my money is not enough to buy all of them at once, so I will just buy them bi-monthly during payday. I swear that self-help and self-development books can do magic. You should try it.

I am starting another journey to self and professional development, which I enjoy by knowing that only a few know what I am up to. I am so grateful to come this far, and the Lord has made it happened. I wouldn’t be writing this article if I wasn’t given the abundance of the provision that the Lord has the only power of. One day, I will be happy to share it in the social sphere and thank people who became instrumental in my journey.

Now that I am entering the other half of my 20s, I will not let time just pass. I have bigger goals, more enormous responsibilities, and more entertaining ways of bringing the best out of this life.

I hope you wish me luck.

What earning my Master’s Degree means to me

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Proceeding to graduate school must not be a necessity for everyone. It may not also be available who wants to proceed considering other factors–priorities, finances, and chances. Sometimes, it only means as a requirement for promotion and “just-to-show-off” kind of thing. However, for me, it’s an eye-opener to understand how the world really works, professionally.

I finished my Master’s Degree in Management focusing in Public Management the moment that I passed the Comprehensive Exam back in 2019. Because of the pandemic however, the University of the Philippines was not able to conduct graduation rites. But the rites alone can’t suffice how happy I am that I finally earned a graduate degree.

  1. Knowledge is really power. Working in the government for almost 5 years now has exposed to many instances to which sometimes I disagree on arguments. Through studying, it helped me build my principles and eventually apply it to my workplace.
  2. A dream come true. Not necessarily that I wanted to study in UP, but I always wanted to learn. My greatest fear is when the day comes that I stop learning– because that’s the only time that I get to influence people and add value to their lives.
  3. Somehow, fulfilling my mother’s dream. Studying in UP was one my mother’s dream for me when I was in College. I didn’t want Fisheries at that time so I took up Journalism (which I like the most) and graduated on time. So The Sablay was somehow a gift to her.
  4. A gateway for more opportunities. Graduating from UP has opened a lot of opportunities for me, to which one of them I never saw coming– I’ll share it with you when the time is right.
  5. A wiser me. Name all the challenges, I had it when I was studying. If not because of the Lord and the people supporting me, I will not make this far. I am ready to take on the next challenge.

Enriching the just the brain when studying defeats its purpose. Earning my Master’s Degree gave me a different kind of confidence and responsibility to influence others positively.

Padayon!